Week Two..second mapping

Today we went to BCCH..(what a coincidence..it was Jean's Day to show support for BC Children), to follow up our appointment.  Cory was on P3 for two days..and is adjusting very well.  From what I was told, it usually doesn't happened that fast so I was already mentally prepared to stay with at least P2 by then.   B, the audiologist did the few words testing with him (Firetruck, snowman, baseball, sailboat and bathtub) to see if he got them all WITH 2nd CI only.  He really did!  She is quite astonished..so was I.   Remember, this is very mimimum setting at this point.   She said wow..that is really good.  She never see this so fast..so it means he is working very hard to hear without using his good "ear".   C, our speech therapist, suggested that I allowed Cory to familiarized the second one without using the first one.  So, we did tried that on Sunday..but he got little mad and kept asking for it back (and plus with his foster mom there..so timing isn't good)  So I then, tried it again on Monday..for awhile.  I would pretend that I'm fixing it and putting new batteries etc.  He accepted it..but 20 minutes later he would ask for it.   Same thing on Tuesday...I took it off for about a hour..the bonus thing it worked because I told him "let's go outside.." Naturally, he would forget about it.  
So for now, it's on P3 and she wants to keep it that way for at least three weeks.  Which I thought it was odd, because the whole part of going back and forth is to increase it each time?    SO there is no P4 or P1 etc..   strange.   The main thing is that I did asked her about keeping the good ear off, and should I keep it going?  She said no..not if he's getting upset about it.   So best thing to follow his feelings with it.   But does it slow his chances of learning to hear more?  No, that what she said.  Interesting..so not really need to do it then.   whew..I just don't like to battle with him or jinx anything!
We talked about using the remote assistance..it is not the greatest thing really..I know everyone is saying it's awesome when they hears about it.  Actually, I find myself not really using it because when I do..Cory get annoyed when I do..(he can hear the beepings..)  And it get malifunctioned when I used it, switching to Telecoil etc.  AND you have to be "close enough" to get it working.  It's just close as you get from face to face conversation.  It's dumb.   AND the alarm won't go off if it's too far out.   so really Cory is in my sight and if it falls off, I can see it right there.  I think a lot of people is going to be a little disappointed with the remote assistance.  


little things count..it's good to know!

I learned so much about the process of getting CI, post-surgery CI, and mappings etc.  I really honestly think little things are important to share beforehand so we are more mentally prepared.  
One thing, during activation, I had to learn something right then..Cory was sorely disappointed that what he heard isn't what he expected.  It would have been nice to warn him beforehand...
The beepings before activation..(downloading..), and maybe should have warned me that it doesn't hurt..what it feels like etc.  I think I am surprised with his reaction...it kinda of made me feel bad about it.  I feel bad NOT telling him what to expect.  He trusts me..I tell him everything.  
Another thing, Cory has been really tired lately..he has a hard time waking up from nap for the past week.  I found out from a friend yesterday that after activation, she finds herself feeling exhausted and would like to take a break now and then from using her CI.  Well, I feel bad for waking Cory up and trying to stick with routines.  But I do get it because I do feel the same way after a long day from school, or workshop or work.  I would like to take a little nap depending on "how much I am listening through the day"..the more I'm listening..the more tired I am.   So today..I am happy to let him sleep more than a hour..to get the rest he needs.  His brain is working hard with listening through the day.  I'll try to post more "helpful" hints from the experiences for other parents/kids who will be getting CI.  It is nice to know..isn't it?  


puh..wheeeeeeeee and BOOM! Where the heck it came from???

WOW..what an explosive language he has been having lately..I don't know if its because of second CI or is one of those thing that just happened like "overnight".. or it's just a fluke. I think.  Since we got home yesterday from preschool, my god..that kid is a chatterbox now! word there, word here, blah blah..both signings and verbally!!!!  My ears and eyes are so tired now for just listening to him!  When Sean got home, I'm like helppppp..you take over.  He didn't get it.  He thought it's more of energy thing that Cory has is making me tired and wore out.  Nope..I didn't say anything because I wanted Sean to see it himself.  He was eating in our kitchen nook and I was in family room with Cory.  Cory was literally chatting with me..this and that over and over..both signs and verbals.  Sean was astonished..he stopped eating and watching.   I finally gave him that nod.."now you see it..this kid won't stop talking".   I'm lying there and talking to Cory back and forth like conversation..he is like an energized pink rabbit that kept on going and going.  I KID you not!!!   Sean started to laugh and CA too..both them were just amazed with this suddenly explosive language coming out of him!  
I told them that in the last hour, we were chatting over dinner..were talking about different things.  He was recalling everything at preschool today, planting seed, dirt, add water.  Talked about playing with Liam, being silly, knocking off blocks, talked about Emerson's cuts on his face, how his brother scatched him, new boy in school today, foster mom came to visit and went home today..blah blah..everything!   I wish I had a video camera that time to show our speech therapy or anyone who can see this!!!


well..that is over..

Some of you aware that Cory's foster mom and her daughter came to visit him over the weekend.  It was bittersweet.   They are such a wonderful people and going out of their way to come and see him for his third birthday.   Bless them from the bottom of my heart.  I think part of the visit was hard for me because Cory was being "spoiled" over the weekend..and therefore lack of ..how do I say this..manners.  (in a polite way..lol)  They asked me beforehand..and I was all for it.  They are special people in his heart and they raised him since birth.  We did a small birthday party for him..huge DQ ice cream cake, some balloons and gifts!  Party hats, blowers and such!  She really wants to do it. 
It was interesting to see how this pan out..how would he react?  You can imagine all sort of scenerios that can come to mind.  And yup, he was very rude, disrespectful to me, Sean and CA.  If we asked him to do something..he would yell "noo.." or in rude way and lean over to them.  He tried to forgo our rules and get away with it.  We did let it go on Saturday but then as the day has progress on...he was getting more rude and not listening at all.  I thought ok..that is not acceptable and we really have to nip it in the bud regardless of visitors.    After they left for the night, Sean and I both told Cory that his behaviours were unacceptable. But figured that it would be best to follow up with it tomorrow morning before they come visit again.    Next morning, sure enough..he knew that they were coming and was being rude to me.   (honestly, I tried so hard not to take it so personally!!!)  The minute he was rude..Sean gave him time out.  And oh boy..he was really mad and screaming.  Sean explained to him about being rude and role playing how he was rude at certain times.  So Sean told him that he wants him to stop saying "No!" and try to be more polite and respectful.  It wasn't to control him by not allowing him to say no..it's more of being respectful that you should do what you're told to do.  For example, time to clean up.  "Ok. Mommy" etc.   So we tried again with him, asking him.  He was rude again.  Time out..then again and again.  We know that he is being very stubborn at that point.   Finally after showing an example by role playing, using me as Cory and then we asked CA to come and we asked her to do the same thing.  She would respond positively.   Then we tried again with Cory, he was about to say "No" again..but then he said "ok, daddy." then started to clean up.  We did the warning, "if you are rude like that again, you will get a timeout."   So part of the morning, it was fine until his visitors came back.  He started being disrespectful to us again and I had to be more courage to give him time out in front of them.   So I did.   And man..he was really screaming and howling.  (like did I hurt him?  you know? ) it was pretty embarrassing.   I just had to stick with it.   when he didn't settled down..I warned him that if you don't settle down I will may have to put you in your room until you calm down.   He finally stopped screaming and start calming down.  For that hour, he got another time out..and he finally gets it.  Like I'm not going to allow this behaviour just BECAUSE you have visitors here and get away with it!  It was so much better after that.  I wonder how she feels about it....honestly, I have no idea.   She is such a sweet soul, I'm feeling like a witch there.     I just think it's really too bad how that she has to see all that..I really wanted her to see how wonderful Cory is and the progress he made.  (oh yeah she sees it..) but I wanted her to see just the way he is normally.  That's all.   ugh.
One thing was that really bothers me was he was calling her mama..I'm like ?!?!?   I signed behind them.."I'm your mama!! don't call her that! " with serious face expression.  And then I told him " say "(her name)," and show him sign name for that too.   Point to her daughter, "(her name)" then to me "Mama", point to CA "Carrie Anne"..just for general.  I hope she doesn't feel offend with me coming up with "Grandma D(name)".  I didn't think of asking her...
Boy, I had to take a day off on Sunday.  I didn't want to be around there anymore.  Just allow Cory with his visitors for the day.  What I can't see..can't hurt me..you know?  I'm glad I did..just to clear my head bit. 

Remote Assistance from Nucleus 5..malifunction?

It was what got my attention.  Cory has his second CI on Thursday..and it has been acting little funny.  Every time I check the remote.  It was changing from P1 to P 3 etc..or it wasn't working.  then Telecoil was showing ..I turned it off...so I thought.  He wore it for awhile that day.  Then on Friday, we did speech session, and I am still figuring out the remote.  I guess it take a while to figure it out by playing.  But the button on the left side is kind of dumb because it's for telecoil.  If you hold it..you can easily accidently press that side button.  So we have to manually remember not to hold the remote this way..hold it differently.  I have the same problem with my blackberry.  My camera would go off all the times because of the side button. 
Anyway, during the day..the telecoil has been turning on several times thru the day.  Cory would tell me..one minute we are eating lunch.  Then he would make a sour face..and automatically go to his left (new) side.  I would ask "what's wrong?" each time.  He said its bothering him...so naturally I get the remote and see what is happening.  The telecoil kept appearing!  I tried to get it off..and it was better but it happened few times in the day.  Finally Cory has enough of wearing it...oy!  I did emailed to BCCH about this..and they gave me few ideas to try.  She said the processors itself is disenable for Telecoil..it shouldn't be on.  BUT..with remote..it is.  I got really frustrated with it....so I decided to forgo the remote and try do it manually with processors itself.  AND finally got it off..so far so good.   I am hearing lately with cases of kids getting second CI (not at the same time as first) hasn't been willing to wear CIs hereafter.  It would start with not wearing the second one after few weeks..the resisting and then started not wearing the first one too.  And these kids opt not to wear them anymore.    Three cases so far from facebook..all recently second CI like Cory.   Oh boy..why this came up now??  Because it's a new thing still..and we are experiencing those.    I hope this isn't the case for Cory.  If worse case scenerio, I will not let him wear the second one.  
The downside for the remote..I can't hear the alarm going off.  LOL.  It is not for me.   At least, Cory is mature enough to put it back on hisself or give it to me.  


jeez......please don't give my kid a candy!

I don't know what it is..but Cory seems to be a "People" magnet..and everywhere we go.  (especially in Cloverdale..where everyone knows everyone.)  I think because he is new to our family, for one.  They know that I'm deaf and now we have one deaf kid..and people tend to be more aware of us than anyone.  Not trying to sound..otherwise.   Of course, when you are using sign language in public place..people tend to stop and stare, it is a beautiful language!!!  Can't blame them.   AND of course, when Cory misbehaves, that is too, entertaining as well.  LOL.   
Just because he is deaf.........please don't give him candy!  Seems that people seem to take pity on ?  I don't know but it was never that bad with my daughter.   Maybe I'm wrong..maybe there is an aura around Cory that it tells people to "give me candy..give me candy?"   Could it be his (not too adorable) smile? 
Anyway, there was one time, we were in an insurance place, a lady gave him a candy..then she remember suddenly, to ask me for permission. (too late!)  I told her..I rather not because he never had a sucker before.  So I had to take it from him.   Of course, Cory starts screaming and hitting me..crying and such.   (Thanks..) and the lady feels really bad about it.  But I don't.   Because knowing when we leave..she will REMEMBER to ask permission first next time.  So I do this..for other parents' sakes.   You can thanks me later..with Tim Horton ice cap anytime!!!!   My girlfriend from Kelwona was telling me similar stories..and her kids would be getting candies all the times from strangers.  (she has five..by the way..) imagine the situation she goes thru?  It drives her CRAZY!!   I had to laugh..but it is really not funny.   What if we didn't know about it?...they choked on it?   or they can be allergic to candy?  or they accept one from stranger..and it could be tainted? or it can cost medical problems (diabetics)..so really please next time.  Ask me first or better yet..a sticker would be great!
Today..we did got one..I didn't noticed it until I paid for the take out and stopped suddenly to see that Cory got a sucker from a Japanese lady.   I think she noticed it..and she said to me I hope that is ok?  She is a really sweet old lady that own a sushi place in Cloverdale.  We are her regular customers...
I just grinned and said thank you.  As soon as we get into the car..I told Cory that we need to have lunch first and candy is for later.  Unfortunately, he already had a few licks...and tried to keep it away from me.  HE knows!!!!!!! I won't let him have it.   I had to try to climb in to retrieve it!  He was screaming and crying for it.  I told him that I will give him a "candy" after lunch.   He actually took his shoe off and tried to throw it at me! (bad throw..)  oy!    Came home and post this "I need a T-Shirt that said "Please do not feed me candy" for Cory" on the facebook.  LOL


well..it's not what I expected. The CI "Activation"

I have trouble downloading the video..sorry.  We got a new computer a while ago..and ever since..we seem have trouble with the Window Vista.  It is very frustrating software..don't get it!

This morning, Cory woke up and first thing he said was "new CI today..go to hospital!"..so we were at ease, knowing that he seems to accept it well.
While in the waiting room, I videotaped him ..I asked him "how you feel?"   He said "very excited..new CI will" in sign language.   It was so cute.
Then we went in..and Beth, the audiologist said first they will do the mapping..programming it into his processor.  She said it's not the activation yet..but Cory will or may hear some beeping sounds.   And sure enough, he responds to it.  He was all smile..and said "I can hear it..like it!..it goes beep beep beep.." and then he was happily playing with his toys.
Then it's time!  Beth told him.."are you ready?  we are going to turn it on".  Cory looked at daddy..then did a little jump..then said "on!"..the look on his face was priceless but...he looked right at me..did few blank stare then grinced, made a sour face and shaking his head.  Then he started to cry..it was pretty sad one.    I tried to coddle him..and tried to ask him "what's wrong?  like does it hurt or what are you feeling?  scared? or etc.  He just kept on crying...then finally looked at me.  Was saying something..sounds like "noo" and then he signed "finish..finish"..but unfortunately have to finish the process..
I kept on saying to him..ok I understand..but have to be patience.  It will be finish soon.  Have to do it all the way.   He then ask for food..lol.  (comfort food??)   I told him that he did a good job..patience.  And he was pretty scared..until Beth gave him a toy piano to play. He really likes it..and start playing it!   
After the activation was done. ..they had to take it and do some adjustments, add batteries, put huggies on it etc.  And then put it back on Cory..he was fine with it..but when it was turn on again.  He then start crying..so I asked him..what's wrong?  tell me tell me..he said "scared"..  then he said "different".  I explained yes..its not the same as you have with other ear..it feels different.  It will get better..it takes time.   Then I really really had to ask him this..when no one was looking..."does it hurt?" ...this is probably the biggest question I often wonder (and I bet lots of people wonder too!)   He said "nooo..this scary."   Interesting..
When we got home..we went outside to play for bit..in the backyard.  About ten minutes later, the new CI was gone!!!!!!! I'm like ?!?!?  Where it is?  Great!  on the first day, we lost it!   I asked Cory..where it is?  He pointed to the tree house...so I had to climb in and get it.  LOL.  I told him..just give it to me when you are finished with it ok?  He said "ok"..
Fast forward to two hours later (after lunch and nap)
He woke up and I only put one on...the other one was downstair.  He asked for it..so I told him where it was.  So we went to get it..and he then didn't want to put it on.   I tried to encourage him to wear it but not TURN it on..so he get used to wearing the device itself.   He was fine with it.   Sure enough, after about ten minutes..he came up to me and said "please turn it on!"   I like the fact that I'm allowing him to chose and when he is ready..he will feel ready to turn it on.  
Prior to this time..he only wore it for a hour and 20 minutes.   I guess it does bother him ..it just doesn't sound the same.


Tomorrow is the big DAY!!!!!! 2nd CI activation..

I wonder..how we all feel upon to this day?  I'm almost excited..just to see how it works and how it will goes.  For the past week, I have been telling Cory about it and even encouraging him to tell people about it to help ease his worries (if any?).  This is a way of preparing him...I am noticing that he is starting to accept it more and more.   Today, I just put him down for a nap.  He said to me "tomorrow, will go to hospital, get new CI".   LOL..he thinks it's bedtime!   That's what we do every night..talk about what is happening tomorrow etc.   I'm guessing here..he is excited?  He talks about it..
It's kind of mixed feelings here..I should be really thrilled about it like most parents anticipating that their child is gonna "hear" like for the first time..but for me.  I'm actually quite neutral about it.   Maybe it's because I already accepted him as a deaf person regardless he have a CI (or two) so my decision is pretty well laid back.  He is doing so good with one, even better with upgrade one.  So I know it won't be a HUGE difference by having a second one.  So maybe that is why I'm not really that excited..
I think one thing..I thought about it.  It was probably too late now.  But I should have done this way..but maybe not necessary (we'll see how it goes tomorrow)   I should have the second one on right now but not TURN it on.  Just enough for him to get used to wearing it..  dang it.   I really like that idea..than "surprise" them that way.   If it doesn't go well.  I already have prepared to let him wear it but not turn it on.   That is one plan I have in mind...
I really wish I could try it on and just to see how it feels.
I promise to videotape this..and post it if I can.   Wish us luck.
Happy Birthday Cory! LOL..what a way to remember your 3rd birthday..a new second CI!


Good to know...

You know..I really wish people would leave comments in my blog..because when I come around.  They are saying "oh I read your blog..and I love it or hate it or whatever..etc." and give me feedbacks.  It's ok to leave me any feedbacks..good or bad.  I'm a big girl I can take it..If its reallllllly bad. I 'll take it out.  LOL.
Seriously, I didn't think people are really reading this..because I hear nothing...................( :) )  That is the case here...read on...

Sean was at preschool today..he "overheard" few comments about how our kids are acting different around at certain places.  Some of the moms were saying that their kid does use his/her speech way more around them or at home.   And doesn't do much at school, or during "speech" sesssions..oh!  that is something we learn today.   I did mentioned to Sean that..Cory doesn't seems to use his speech as much as I thought.  Like I mentioned in my last blog..and Sean said.."what are you talking about?????"  He is using words a lot!  and pointed out each one during our dinner conversation.  I have to admitted I was bit dumbfounded.. (duhhhh)  I can't hear it..that is the downside.  Don't get me wrong.. I CAN hear him saying something..but not words because he is too fast to lipread or not even looking at me etc.   It's really tough.   I assumed it's blabbling stuff... 
And of course, he is not gonna show or say it with our speech therapist either.   So..he is comfortable to use it with us.  INTERESTING!!!
I gave CA a simple task..a notepad and a pen. Every words, Cory said..to write it down.

And remember my eariler blog, few weeks ago..I gave you a website to check out what it is like for me to hearing certain things?   So you can see what I mean about not able to catch Cory's with his speech developments?  go figure..
if you haven't.   Here it is..http://www.betterhearing.org/hearing_loss/hearing_loss_simulator/index.cfm
(Mine  is "Moderate")


Speech..is somewhat coming along.

I think we are little worried..but maybe we shouldn't.  Cory's speech isn't coming along like it should be or as we would expected.  Is it because he doesn't want to?  or it is because he is too busy playing and wanting to be a boy.  Or is it because a boy thing?   You know how fast he learned with sign language and he is 3.5 age of expressive and receptive is more..not yet have data.   We are not sure if its something that we have to adjust his CI for more clear speech?  or wait until the second one come..?  But I'm just happy that he is communicating his own way with using sign language than better none!  We do noted his "blabbling stage" right now..and he is using a word or two and lots of sounds.   He would try to repeat the words in his own pace.  but when we are doing speech sessions..he doesn't really want to do it.  He kept saying he wants to play.   I can see why at certain times, with certain speech therapists need to be firm and try to work at it.  They want the same success as we do..... yet, I hear horror stories about speech therapists or at session times.    It's not that they want to hurt anyone or try to do something that we, as a parents, may not like it or take it the wrong way.   They are here to help us..and if our kids are not doing or focus as they want to.  It means we have to do something different..   Otherwise, speech/language won't come along as you would want to.   (unfortunately)    For Cory, the main thing is..he has to learn that this is the time to do speech, this is the time to play.  And keep it separate.  He has to learn that..because it is something he may do for a long time..so when it's a better time to do that? Now..not later.   We are going to work on.."Listening time" (it means auditory, speech focus etc.)   and label it as part of on going sessions.   We will do bit of "playing" at his own pace, then "Listening time" for 10 minutes, then he get to pick his own activity for 10 minutes. Then back to "Listening Time"..back and forth.  I look back to my time..I had speech sessions..and yes..I have to admit it was not fun.  It was DIFFERENT at my time.   It was THEIR way for a whole hour and it was long and hard.     We have to allow Cory to have some flexibility and make fun during this process.  And I want to let her (speech therapist) to do her job as best as she can.  They just have to figure out the best way to get him interested and make it more fun somehow. 
It's a good lesson for him to learn how to sit through any structured process..later on, he will fare better in circle time, story time by learning to sit and listen.  
We, as a parent, need to sit back and allow this process to take time..give feedbacks if you know that would help.  After all, we want the best for our child.  And..as the process come along..if speech isn't what Cory is best at.  Then we won't worry about it too much..as long as he still "communicate" with us.  This is why we chose to both ways of communication.


..LOL...opps. Cory learned a lesson.

I had to laugh..last night, Cory learned a lesson the hard way. I'm glad I let it go..and see what happens.
Every night, we would be fighting about him wanting salt in his food..naturally, I do it for him.  He wants to do it himself.  And of course, I wouldn't let him!   But after reading the book.."Rule 4..Almost any rule can be broken occasionally"... blah blah ...this left us with two further choices: beat outselves up over it, or go with the flow.  As you and I know, the only "sensible Rules" choice is to let it go..let him do it himself or get stressed over something like putting too much salt (literally)..a natural consquence will follow if occurs.  Child will learn from it..
So basically, rather fight over it every nights,  he asked for salt/pepper every time! I tried ignoring, pretending not to see him asking for one..so I'm like fine go ahead.   Even, I told him very little..but with his stubborness..he wants to do it his way!   You guess it...what happened?   He had way too much on his food, luckily only on potatos not other items..and he was so proud of it.  I'm like..whoa that is too much!! Cory!   He said "it's fine"...all of us stopped eating and eyes wide OPEN...watching him taking a bite........and the look on his face was priceless. I wish I had my camera/video.   And he didn't say anything..eyes were watery and face bit little red..and he kept on going.   Then he literally grimaced and shuddered with second bite.   And he said he doesn't want it anymore..he flapped his arms and said "water please!!"  All of us were laughing and try not to laugh.   We told him that he has to finished it (two more bites but most of the salt were gone anyway..) he didn't want to..but no dessert!    Even I asked him if he wants some more salt??  "No thank you!"...
By the way..in case you're wondering..it's seasoning salt..we never have white type at our table anyway. 

Today, he wanted to pour the milk..oh no!   this too, occurs every night, he wants to do it on his own.  So naturally, I let him do it himself.     Oh well...our dining floor needs washing anyway.  Thank god, its not a full jug.   He did pour and overflow big time, too fast and all over the table.  I made him clean it up..and no more milk left. (there was another jug in the fridge but..not telling him)  It took him a while to clean up..drip drip from table to sink..back and forth.  groannnn.   took him long time to clean up..another good lesson.  I wonder tomorrow would he let me do it for him?   grin.


Rules of Parenting...

I found a book that I remember had before..today I looked in the basement through hundred of books I had for college studies.  One of the book is "Real Boys" by William Polluck, Ph.D .  Glance through few pages, fell asleep before even getting into it.   It's really not something maybe I need right now for Cory..but I found a WONDERFUL book that I can't put it down. "THE RULES OF PARENTING" By Richard Templar.  It's almost like a bible for parents..read it bit each day.  I find myself really hook into it..and it made me a better person.  Really!!!  I think it's just the way the world are today..we forget to be "parents" at times.  I'm just thankful that I'm not working at this moment.  It allows me to be more freedom, being myself and a mom.  ITS A MUST READ...for all parents!!! You won't be disappointed.  Go buy one!  It's only 10 bucks at Costco..
You can check it out the reviews: http://www.pearsoned.co.uk/Bookshop/detail.asp?item=100000000245402 

I'll give you one example:  Rule #7  "It's Normal to Want to Escape"....heheh..that's for me.  Quote..Funny thing is, it's considered fine to be irriated by other people's children (not that you're supposed to say so to their face).  So we all know kids can get on our nerves. Which is why it follows that your own kids can drive you mad at times. AND that's OK.  
I like that..so I'm not insane.   Its most HONEST (brutally) OPEN book I ever read.  I would love to share little bit with that book each time..
I am going to admit something...last night, I just took off.  Sean was out fishing all day..supposedly to be home around 3pm..and didn't get home until 7:30pm.  I was a little tired, stressed out..(plus the fact that Sean and his friends got stuck on Fraser river and couldn't get to shore safety) and Cory's behaviours all week.   I kissed my kids good night (and my husband too..that's why I said "kids"..) and just left.  Of course, where else would I go at such a late night..I went to Walmart for few hours that I never really had a chance to scoop around and find certain items, plus groceries with Tim Horton's coffee in my hands.  That is heaven!! I really needed that!   Was back about 11pm...probably the latest shopping trip I ever went.  It would be nice to have a mall that opens all night for us moms who need the "escape"..


that was hard...

We went to CA's first soccer game today..it was nice to see CA making new friends on her new team.  It was an exhibition game..against CA's old team from last year.  Sean decided to go fishing with his buddies for the day.   So naturally, I had to bring Cory to the game.  It's better when both of us (Sean and I) are there so we can take turns to watch Cory, play with Pepper etc..and watch CA's game at the same time.  Today I decided not to bring the dog..it was a wise decision.  It would have been too much..
Cory has a hard time not going out and play..he wants to go out and play.  Holding him back was tough..he was screaming and kicking me.   We opt to stay behind the fence so he can't get in.  He saw a park nearby..but I told him after the game we can.  Guess how many times he ask..and hit me..and whining..lots!  then he keep taking off, walking toward to the park.  I had to bring him back few times.  Sure enough..he was mad.  
He eyed a consession stand..oh great..start asking for something goodies.  I told him no money.  and I literally showed him all my pockets so he doesn't get melt downs.   (and praying that someone within the earshot WOULDN'T dare to offer some!!!!) 

Lesson one..if you're on your own..don't feel guilty about not bringing the dog.   One kid is enough.
Lesson two..make sure you have snacks, and water with you. don't bring money!  Consession stand is hard enough !
Lesson three..bring few items to keep him busy..( I didn't..but found a toy car that was in the stroller pocket)..thank god.  and an extra soccer ball.  
Lesson four..if all else fails..ask a soccer mom to take CA home, and can go home eariler. 

Lesson four..didn't happened..whew.  I gave him that warning..if you dont stop crying, whining or hitting..we'll go home RIGHT NOW.    for the rest 40 minutes..it was all good.  :)

oh ya..by the way, Sean paged me a photo of his "catch of the day"...


Much much better..

Today was so much better..could be not getting enough sleep is one factor..and I have tried to go down to his level more with eye contact and hands on approach.  And even warning him as well..(know what behaviour he will display beforehand)..then I tried 1,2,3 Magic as well.  It seems to be more calmer today.  Even during Speech session..he was a little cheeky but this is his way of saying..I'm bored.  Let do something else..
We went to Story Time at Cloverdale library..it was bit distracting because I think we pick the wrong class! It was mainly for toddlers..but language wise..its more simple, repetitions, actions.  Cory seems to enjoy that..but I often had to remind him to keep watching the librarian not the toddlers running around.   I am thinking of trying the another one at 10am (preschool level..) and see.  
I am doing more of choices..so that way he have bit of empower.  Yet, I keep forgetting to do that...what's wrong with me?!?!?  We are so busy that we forget to stop and smell the flowers at times.  Especially with toddlers and preschoolers, they really need a moment to gather thoughts and process things..they do it differently that we do.   Today, I ask Cory what do you want for lunch?  colored pasta or salmon pasta..he picks the salmon one..(which I was very surprised..to be honest) and if I pick that..he would be saying nooo and we would be fighting "eat this" battles..
I had to chuckle..in the corner of my eye, while he was eating the salmon pasta..he was signing.."I don't like this..eww gross."  He thought I wasn't looking.   Then when I was..I asked "don't like it?"  he said "like it like it..mmm" with a fake phony smile.   Little bugger!     I don't know what is his game there.    You got me...
I have been really firm with him this morning about screaming today.  I looked right at his eyes and said..today I want you not to scream at me or if you do, you will get time outs.  do you understand?  He said "yes, understand, no screaming".   That kind of warnings help him to put things in perceptive.  So far, only two screamings..not bad.  Things are looking up now.   I thank you for friends to give me some encouragement words and advices through private emails. 


do deaf kids literally scream louder than others???

Seriously, this is an issue at our house now.  Cory is really loud these days..any words he say..he is almost screaming.  Hard to tell for me if he is "screaming" behaviour wise..or saying words LOUDLY..there is a big difference that Sean and CA can tell ..but seriously.  For me..it's hard.  I m trying to nip it ..but at the same time..you are suppose to encourage kids who are learning to talk and let them be verbal. It's all part of the process.    ack.  I wonder if I was like that too when I was learning to talk?  I have no idea..but that big question I'm going to ask my parents soon..   When Sean and CA say that he isn't "really" screaming..but I said ok fine..is that normal to say that "loudly"..do we all say that "loudly"???  they both said no..  Point taken.   I really have to ask around about that..I really hope it's only a temporary thing.  I also wonder if his CI is not loud enough so he has to be loud to "hear" himself????   so many questions.
Today is louder than usual for some reasons.  Every words he says, it's almost like screaming. I tried to look at his face expressions to see if it was a rude remark or natural.  Hard to tell..today, he was JUST plain old grumpy kid.
After bath, I took him out. And we were drying off. And he said loudly, "NO..do myself!"  I'm sitting there, thinking..is he being rude?  I tell him.."Cory..you don't have to say that loud..just say nicely."  this is what I'm telling him all week.  but still does..
But when he screams...OY..he really screamed!!  wow.....that is another thing.   I try to label his feelings so he can see the proper way of expressing himself rather than screaming.  I'm not sure about giving him time outs for each time he screams.  That would be like every 10 minutes.   Help Super Nanny!!!!!! Come over here.  LOL 

Little astonished..

I'm feeling little disencouraged today..Cory was really really phyiscal with me today..threw lots of punches.  I'm like what the heck ???? where did that comes from?  We are very strict with no hittings in this house.  It happened when I asked him to do a certain thing..he would just attacked me.  Of course, I gave him time out.   He would say "sorry..ok?" hugs and its all forgiven.  (seems to be too much of occurrances lately though) Hit, sorry, ok?  hit, sorry, ok?  see the patterns? 
We went to Strong Start preschool, they have it everywhere in Surrey if you look up..close to your neighbour. www.sd36.bc.ca/general/programs/strongstart.html
 It's sponsored by the Ministry of Education.   Since there is no regular preschool sessions at Cory's center..(break) so we took an advantage of going there.  It wasn't too bad.  (Parent) You have stay there.  They will provide story time, snack time, circle time etc..same as typical preschool.   Anyway, it's Monday to Friday from 8:45 to 11:45..always ask for the schedule it varies.  Gym time, library time.  It's nice. we have been there few times.
 Anyway, today it went well until I gave Cory a warning that after he finished his snack, we will be leaving.  I had to do bit of grocery shopping and wanted Cory to play outside before lunch. Even told him that..  He SCREAMED at me..literally "NOOOOOOO!"  it was horrible. I never see that..wow.  I then said ok that it..TIME OUT..and he just got very furious and start attacking me..throwing punches and screaming.    It was pretty embarrassing..everyone was looking at us..and even teacher came over to see what's wrong.  I quickly explained and I was little shocked..so I decided to forgo snack and just go.  Because while time out, he was screaming and screaming..and if I was near him..he started attacking me.  I tried to put his jacket on..it just made it worse.  So I literally grabbed all my stuff and picked him up..and left.      He was so furious and I really had to held on him so he doesn't attack me again or take off.  It really really took all my strong will not to lose it..I almost cried ..I almost wanted to snap but knowing it's not gonna help.  Thank god for being DEAF..I can easily turn off my hearing aids not listening to his howlings and crying on the way home.
I just left him in the truck for a minute..to catch my breath.   Then I was ready to take him into the house.  As soon as I open the door, he said "sorry..ok?" 
I wanted to say NO THAT IS NOT OK!!!!  I know you all parents have a duty to forgive and accept apolozies when our kids do that.   I just had to wonder..is this kind of thing Cory thinks that whatever his behaviours he does..it will make it go away by saying "sorry..ok?"  does he really understand the consquences??  
Back to my story..I just said NOTHING..I took him out of car seat.  He say " can I play bike outside?" I didn't say anything. I just closed the garage door.  I just glared at him.  Went into the house..and do my own thing..ignored him.  Did nothing with him for good 30 minutes..he knows I'm mad.   he didn't go bug me or ask for anything.  He just went to play by himself..I can see from corner of my eye, he is constantly checking on me to see if I would say something.  
Silence is GOLDEN...kids know.  Rather react to him and his behaviours..take away consquences, no special privlages..just ignore him (mentally think yourself in Spa or a happy place), have a mocha, don't talk at all. 
I finally had a talk with him..when we both calm down.  I told him that I was VERY disappointed with his behaviour..specificially hitting, screaming etc.  It was NOT acceptable..and we had to leave because of that.  If that happened again, we will leave right away.  He said ok..with such a sad look..(so cute!!!) and said "I'm sorry" and gave me a hug.  
Honestly...does he gets it?   Will this happen again?  who knows..I just feel like the story doesn't end here....


Can't wait for the rechargable batteries! and extra Remote Assistance..can't return it!!!!!

I was told that with rechargable battery..his CI would be bit smaller!  neato!!   I didn't like how big it is on him..but can't complain compares to Freedom one.   We are supposed to get one..but it's apparently on back orders..and it might be a while. 
We got duplicate of everything..including the remote assistance..that unit alone cost $500.00 bucks! oy.  I called today to see if we can take it back because honestly we don't need two! and it would be nice to have that extra credit on line so we'll use it for more supplies if we need.  They wouldn't do it!  I'm like that money was paid by us and we do have the right to decline the remote assistance. (we will be getting one anyway on April 22 when Cory goes for second activation!)   I am not sure..I agreed with this so called policy. I haven't even open it yet!  Still in package etc...anyone????


We had a nice Easter..a suprise visit from the bunny!  My daughter asked if she can help hiding them the night before!  ack!  I said to her..what makes you think of that???  She just said.."moooooommmmmm!" I told her if that if she spoiled the "surprise"..she will not be getting any.  Then she said "ha ha I knew it! "..dang it girl!!!!!!
CA didn't care much for the hunting part..more of helping Cory to find some.
Naturally Cory asked where the bunny?  LOL..He is gone to hide more eggs at someone's else house.  He then ran out to the front door and wanted to see..
Cory has a few chocolate eggs and we told him that is enough.  We will have some breakfast, get ready for church etc.  Cory wanted some more..so we had to take it away..he got bit upset.  He tells us that he wants to carry the basket around.  I told him that is fine but don't eat anymore candies ok?  He said ok.
Five minutes later, sneaky little bugger..he sneaked a piece into his mouth!  CA caught him..but we didn't see anything.   Sean decided to leave the baskets on our coffee table so kids can just "look" but not to touch.  Few minutes later, Cory took another one!!! I caught him!  So much for trusting him! LOL.  I had to put it up on kitchen counter..naturally he starts getting upset.   "MINE, don't touch"..using his voice! 


Post Surgery..Day 12 Still tender?

In this photo, you can see some hard crust like substance still stuck in his hair.  I m not sure exactly what it is..some sort of super glue or.  I have a hard time washing that out.  Literally, I'm trying to pick it out but Cory would be grimacing when I do that. any ideas???
Oy!..I was given a go ahead to wash his hair after 10 days.  Yup!  It is hard NOT to do that but that is why I had to give Cory very short short haircut..not much to wash it. Other than just using facecloth "bath"..easiest that way.   So on Saturday, he was screaming his head off, he doesn't want me to wash his head, submerge in the bath water.  Oh boy..I'm not sure if it's because of his surgery or it is behaviour again.  (it's the same behaviour we had when we first got him..he doesn't like getting his head wet.)  Right at the beginning, we would start washing his hair before letting him play with toys..and put up with his resistings and screamings. I remember having to do that really quick so it make it's not too bad for him..you know?  Eventually he started to get used to it, and was accepting it.   Now we're back to square one..so I had to do it and quick.  WOW..I never hear him screaming so bad and loud.   His face was really red!!  He was so angry. 
Tonight the same thing..whew..I need to figure this out.   I wonder if he is sensitive in that area where the stitches are or tender sore?   It's funny because in the last five days..he has been house-roughing and jumping around, boinking his head on certain things. I'm like "be careful...doesn't that hurt?" pointing his stitches (it's gone now..but the scar's there)  He said "nope".   Although he misses wearing his favorite hat..and even bike helmet too..it's still bothersome..rubs the wrong area.  
I had to hold off, not letting him go play outside for as long as I can...I was truly thankful for rainy, stormy and cold weather so we couldn't go outside and ride bikes.  To avoid for Cory's having to wear his bike helmet...he opt not to wear it because of the stitches but still insisted on riding bike.  Guess what happened?  He got the biggest meltdown..so outside time was over within 5 minutes.   So we had lousy weather in past week so thank god..it just make things easier not to go out.  Yesterday and today, can't avoid it..so we went outside but I came up with him wearing a hoodie (thin type) not too thick and he can wear it underneath his bike helmet.  It worked!   
I do asked him from time to time if it's sore or hurting.  He would point to his old scar/injury his chin!!!!!!! (if you read my blog before..that was a month ago!)   so I am not sure.   Im curious to know if anyone experiences that ..please leave a comment so others can benefits from it as well. 
A friend of mine who has CI too, it was almost a year ago..wow that is fast.   She suggested a GEL like pillow for sleeping.  She mentioned how it was sore and hard for her to sleep on her CI side for almost 6 months to a year.   I did went out and looked at two different places..couldn't find one.   Maybe next weekend if we go down to USA..I'll look there.  It was former Linen and Thing store that has one..

I am pleased to tell you that Nucleus 5 is awesome!   Cory doesn't wear baby wear anymore..and it hasn't fall off once!!!! and for some reasons it stay up longer than the old one.  Maybe it's lighter and it doesn't fall off as much as Freedom type.   He loves it!  and he has been saying more words these days..:)   Still use sign language as primary and foundation for language purposes.   I try not to sign to him as much so he would get the full verbal understanding, and when he doesn't get it. Then I would sign to him.  It's only when we are "testing" and practicing.  I wouldn't do that during conversation time or story time etc ..that's not fair.  I want him to sign to me anyway..because even though he may say a word or two.  I'm not hearing it like everyone would.  So it's important that he and I have that relationship through sign language.



My heart is racing when I write this...ugh.  We just got home after Pepper's Vet appointment.   For the first time, Cory took off running and ran across the road!!!!!!!  I yelled at him "STOP" but he seems didn't hear me.  He wore a toque today because its really cold and windy.  I don't know if that "block" his hearing.  But I THANK GOD that there were no cars around that time.  oy!!! Seriously, he never done that before, took off running to across the road!   I was really upset.  Maybe its time to teach him safety and such.  Words like "not safe, dangerous, will hurt,"..
In the meantime, I am doing bit of testing..to see if he could hear me through helmet, toque, hat etc.  Im really curious if anyone notice that?
I still can't believe it!  Talk about CLOSE call!

Upgrade NEW CI...nice!

Cory got a new CI processor (upgrade from his old one so it will be the same as his other one when it's time)    It is really exciting and so much better.  Cory doesn't seem not need to wear the lite cable (baby wear) anymore.  Yessss!!!!
We had our ENT follow up appointment yesterday and at the same time, we were lucky enough to come in to adjust his new CI.   Cory was a little upset because he thought it was going to be the other "side"...and I had to keep telling him no..its not "ready"..it has to heal first.   And I am using words like "replace old with new one" etc.   He was a little resistant at first, kept pointing to other side.  Oh boy..I have a picture of him..but unfortunately I can't show his face! but you can see the body language.  Anyway, he finally accepted that he is wearing the new one.  He seems to like it..no wire and such.  
As for the new one, Beth said it has arrived and I was like no no don't show it to him!  He will get upset if he doesn't get it.   But will get it on April 22nd for activation!  Look forward to this..and she also explained to me that it will not sound the same as he normally hears.  So I have to explain to him and warn him, he might not like it..he might accept it.  who knows?  It's another journey for us to embark on...